Everything changed and then it changed again.

When God gives you a specific direction for your life, you have only two options: you follow it or you don’t. The latter allows you to maintain the illusion of control. It allows things to stay comfortable, not necessarily good, but comfortable. The former requires a decision to let go. To release your plans, your logic and your comfort zones and move into the unknown. Either you let go or you attempt to stay in control. There is no middle ground. In both scenarios, there is loss. Either you lose what is familiar and secure or you lose an opportunity to become more dependent on God.

Recently, this has been our question. Do we quit our jobs and leave a life we truly and deeply love to follow God’s leading? Or do we not?

Some background information is needed. Two years ago, we whittled down our lives to 4 suitcases and bought a one-way ticket to the Big Island of Hawaii. We left what was nailed down to seek adventure, newness and a change of perspective. Little did we know, that was exactly what God had in mind for us. In the past 2 years, God has revolutionized our lives. He has given us friends who are our family, a hobby (surfing) turned obsession, an amazing church and youth group, and fulfilling jobs. But God has given us more than just provision.

For Evan, priorities were radically altered. God, who was once relegated to church and an occasional deeper experience, became the sole focus for his life. He grew to understand that intimacy with his Creator is the primary purpose for his existence, everything else being diminished in comparison. He began to learn what it means to truly trust God with everything and to seek life only from Him. Through this, long-term addictions were broken and a burning passion ignited.

For Rozalyn, God taught her to be content in life and find her contentment in Him. She found that releasing her desire to secure her own satisfaction allowed her to trust in God to be the provider of her contentment. “For I have learned to be content whatever the circumstances. I know what it is to be in need, and I know what it is to have plenty. I have learned the secret of being content in any and every situation, whether well fed or hungry, whether living in plenty or in want. I can do all this through him who gives me strength” (Phil 4:11-13).

But God decided to take us one step farther. Over the past two years, God has been encouraging Evan to set aside a year to spend with Him. Whether it was others speaking into his life, divine prompting, or "coincidentally" meeting people in ways to unusual to be chance, Evan felt directed towards a School of Biblical Studies in North Carolina (see link on side for more details). In September 2010, near the end of a three week time of prayer and fasting, Evan was watching an episode of Lost and was struck by the notion that the characters were directly called to the Island for a specific purpose. This inspired the question “God, why don’t you ever give me specific direction?” Instantly, the reply “I already have. Now follow it,” filled Evan’s mind. Bombshell. Reality changes, never to be the same.

The months that followed consisted of a battle between our desires to hang on to a life we couldn’t imagine getting any better and utter submission to the road Divinely prepared ahead of us. For Rozalyn, she learned to trust in God despite not everything being firmly in place. She also found joy in God giving her direction even though she didn’t understand the direction fully. Through this, she has been able to submit herself to God for a year of service, regardless of what it entails. For Evan, it was a process of waiting patiently for all of the pieces to fall into place, trusting that God had spoken and would continue to walk ahead of us providing direction when needed, which He did and does, every time.

In the end, we both came to the conclusion that there is only one way to answer God’s direct leading, no matter how difficult: whatever you desire Lord, let your will be done. The pain and heartache that come with stepping away from the secure and moving into the unknown are necessary in dependence and sanctification. April and May (2011) consisted of buying a one-way ticket back to the mainland, quitting our jobs, and beginning the extremely difficult process of saying good-bye.

Few things are certain for us in the upcoming year. We know that we will be living in a small town, Lake Lure, just outside of Asheville, NC. Evan will be studying God’s word 8 hours/day, 5 days/week. Rozalyn will be volunteering full-time with the school, doing whatever is needed. Beyond that, uncertainty reigns. Financial provision for Rozalyn is yet to be given. Friendships and fulfillment of personal passions lie ambiguously out of reach. There are times when it all feels too overwhelming. But then there are also moments when the excitement of following God into an adventure of His choosing is more than we can bare. Days when the promise that “the Lord your God is with you wherever you go” (Joshua 1:9) is more than enough to sustain our souls. Through it all, we echo Paul’s cry, “But whatever were gains to me I now consider loss for the sake of Christ. What is more, I consider everything a loss because of the surpassing worth of knowing Christ Jesus my Lord, for whose sake I have lost all things. I consider them garbage, that I may gain Christ” (Philippians 3:7-8).

So this is our life. Beyond simply wanting to let you know what is going on, we seek and desire your prayer and words of wisdom. If God places it on your heart to pray for us, please do. Each word uttered to the Father on our behalf means so much to both of us. Also, if you have wisdom and advice to pass our way, please do not hesitate. So many times, words from others are like manna from Heaven, providing essential nourishment in times of need. If you feel led and would like to financially support Rozalyn during her time of volunteering at the school, please contact her at roz_dawn@yahoo.com. Thank you in advance for your prayers and words of wisdom. Aloha.