Songs of Songs vividly shows God’s enjoyment of lovers doing
what they do best: loving each other. Whether it’s verbally or physically, its
pages are filled with beautiful scenes of a man and woman consumed with their
love and desire for one another. One of
the main things that struck me was how concerned the man was with his lover’s
self-image. Each time she would downplay
her beauty (1.5,6; 2.1) or speak more highly of another (3.6-11?), he would
reply without hesitation with words of affirmation. He tells her of her physical beauty: “You are altogether beautiful, my love;
there is no flaw in you” (4.7), of her effect upon his life: “You have ravished my heart, my bride”
(4.9) and of his commitment to her: “There
are 60 queens and 80 concubines, and maidens without number. My dove, my perfect one, is the only one” (6.8,9). Each time he spoke tenderly of his love, she
replied with words of appreciation and acts of physical love. Essentially, through continually reaffirming
her of her beauty and his love and commitment, he was able to quiet her
insecurities and win her love, which she gave to him freely.
Application comes easy on this one. Men, we must continually (daily) affirm our “beloved” of her beauty, worth and of our love. More than ever, they are bombarded with images of what beauty is and how they don’t quite measure up. It is our God-given responsibility to quiet her insecurities through a continual outpouring of words of affirmation and affection. Women, feed off of your “beloved’s” words and reward him for the love he shows you. Allow him to enjoy your beauty.
It is so clear from this book that God has created man and
woman (in an exclusive relationship, ie. marriage) to feed off of their desires
and longings (emotional and sexual) for each other and seek fulfillment in one
another (emotionally and sexually). Embrace
and cherish this gift.